The Kentino Saga Pt.1 A New Hope

Once upon a time in a small village there lived a young peasant boy by the name of Kentino. Kentino was a pleasant young man, and his name was spoken well of around his small village. To this point in his life his main enjoyment came from writing poetry, making music, and spending time with his friend the prince. Kentino was well known for his long locks of gold and his taste for heavy pounding music, but his main claim to fame came from his friendship with Prince Tuck.

Yes, Prince Tuck was a truly dynamic figure. His stature was like that of a five foot six inch tall oak tree. Prince Tuck was an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru. He wrote award¬ winning operas, translated ethnic slurs for Hungarian refugees, and taught Zamfir everything he knew about the pan flute. He could woo women with his sensuous and godlike kazoo playing, and he could cook thirty minute brownies in twenty minutes. Prince Tuck participated in full contact origami, bred prize winning snails, and owned his own line of original corduroy evening wear. Using only a hoe and a thimble of water he single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants.

Now my description of Prince Tuck tends to go on for a couple more paragraphs, and Kent did not want me to take up to much time so if you don’t mind I think I will skip down to the end.

You won’t get the full effect of my story, but you will still get the gist.

…okay yeah, here we go…

…can leap a Quonset hut in a single bound and is faster then a speeding BB. He has won bullfights in San Juan, cliff diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. Yes, Prince Tuck was truly a man’s man.

Over the years their friendship grew and blossomed. The two boys talked and shared all they thought on any subject. Their friendship was thick; some may say closer then family. This should have been enough for Kentino, but no, he had to go and start liking girls, the original carriers of Kooties. Oh, once you get Kooties you are lost, there is no going back and there is no cure. Kentino’s demise came in the form of the young maiden Angelina. With her golden brown hair and love of music Kentino was no match for Angelina, and so he fell. Prince Tuck knowing there was no cure for Kooties resolved to listen to his friend’s endless talk about the young maiden.

Kentino being a smart man devised a plan to get to know the young maiden; he would take Angelina in his chariot to their friend’s minstrel practice hoping in turn to learn more about her.

Kentino’s plan seemed to work, until one fateful night when Prince Tuck met up with Angelina’s evil brother Durik. While consuming supper at the quaint Scottish inn, McDonalds (sorry my Scottish accent is not that good), Durik and a friend began talking about a relationship developing between a particular girl and guy. Prince Tuck, not wanting to be left out of the conversation, tried jumping in mid-stream. Oh the best laid plans are never foolproof, fools are just too ingenious. Before Prince Tuck could get his wits about him, Durik was asking if it was true that Kentino liked Angelina. Well wanting to keep Kentino’s trust Prince Tuck tried to think up the perfect answer to the question put forth to him. If he said “no” that would be lying, and if he said “yes” he would be betraying his friend. What was the prince to do? He needed the perfect non-committal answer he could find. “No comment” was all that came forth. The silence was horrible, Tuck knew he had used the wrong answer and must save the situation. “If I gave you an answer to the positive or negative I would be betraying Kentino’s friendship” said, Prince Tuck. Well, this answer only fueled Durik’s passions and enthusiasm, and he proceeded to proclaim that Kentino liked his sister. Prince Tuck tried to calm the evil brother, but to no avail, and Durik proceeded to go to another table and tell them of his findings. Prince Tuck, feeling that be might have had a little part in setting the events into motion, ran home to tell Kentino of the evenings happenings. Kentino was panic stricken, what was he to do when Durik told his sister of his findings? He felt he had to act.

The next day when Kentino dropped Angelina off after minstrel practice he turned to her and said “Your brother has probably told you that he thinks I like you. Well I mean I do like you and want to get to know you, but not to date you. Well you know if that should happen that would be good, but I am just trying to get to know you, maybe dating in the future. I just thought I would set that straight”. Angelina slowly turned to Kentino and said, “My brother never said a thing to me”. Oh no! What had Kentino done! He had just committed the worst mortal sin a young man could have done… he admitted he liked her to her face. Oh the agony! What was Kentino to do now?

Well, after that this thing basically writes itself, and I hope there are many more happy chapters…

Prince Tuck (AKA Jason Tucker)